When Promotions Don't Match Your Service Experience: Slow Sundays @ Dockland's

That's Melbourne are doing their Slow Sundays at Dockland's again this year. In theory, the idea is fantastic. A bunch of participating restaurants offer tasting plates or smaller-than-main sized meals (usually three-quarter size) and a glass of wine or a beer for $15. Plus, you get the lovely water views, the idyllic location and proper service.

My argument is that if you eat at one place and are still hungry, you can go somewhere completely different and for another $15 (a grand total of $30) you get the equivalent of one and a half meals and two standard drinks (and a slightly different view of the same body of water).

So, we checked it out! A booking was made for Meccah Bah at 3pm. At 2.58pm, we arrived. We were told we were 'late' for our 2pm booking but 'that's okay'. We then had clumsy waiters fumble around and not know what was going on. One told us that the 'Slow Sunday menu comes with a small sausage. It is very small' so we 'may want to get something else'. This sort of thing continued with the same waiter later. What looked to be someone's credit card was lying on the ground and we pointed it out to him, but he picked it up and walked back and said, 'That's not a credit card. It belongs to a waiter. It's what we use.'

I really wish I'd told him, 'Who gives a shit?!' I thought the usual custom was to say, 'Thanks, how's your meal?' and walk away. Attentive, yet not there. Helpful, but not overbearing. I've never worked in the industry, aside from a brief stint at KFC at 14 years and 9 months of age, but I think they couldn't have tried harder to be less enthusiastic about being there.

It sounds like my beef is with the waiters and it is, so I shouldn't blame the promotion, right? It's not that simple. Restaurants aren't forced to be part of Slow Sunday's -- in fact -- less restaurants are doing it this year than last. By choice. Also, the vibe the ads create (and what the restaurants sign up to deliver) is one where someone can relax on a Sunday afternoon, sample some fine food, receive great service and not have to pay a fortune because A) It's Sunday; and, B) It's Lunchtime! The theory works.

What instead happens is you walk in thinking you're getting business-class service for an economy fare, but soon enough find yourself like cattle, trudging to the back of the plane. Sad thing is though, at only $15, we'll probably be there again this Sunday, "late" for our 3pm booking.